30 is the new 20!

What would happen??

What would happen if we all just LOVED one another? What would happen if we were not all so defensive and had to come back with a quick remark when someone said something offensive to us? What would the world look like if we took a second to realize that everyone is going through something and we all sin, so who are we to say one sin is weighed heavier than another? What would happen if we quit putting ourselves above others?

I don't know about you, but I am very stubborn, I like to be right, and I will argue my point until you agree with me. WHY do we do this? Why is it so hard to walk away and be content with someone not seeing our view, or not agreeing with us? Why is it so hard to ALLOW others to be who they are and think the way they do? Why is it so hard to ACCEPT them and love them no matter what they think or do?

I have no answers here. I am just thinking out loud. I know what I am supossed to do, but why, in those moments, is it so hard to just not banter back and just be loving towards people the way Jesus intended for us to. Why is it so hard to be that person?

Sometimes you need little reminders :)

Life is like a puzzle, you have to try out different pieces to find the ones that fit. Sometimes, I get frustrated with the pieces. I seem to always be given the wrong shape of pieces and nothing fits. Maybe my piece is not done figuring out its shape and so I am not ready to find the one that fits. I do know what I am looking for, but sometimes I feel like I am an not the person who deserves that, because I am not who I want to be. I know there is a great plan for me and I intend to wait for what God has in store for me.

Life is funny...

I had a little revelation, you could say, the other day. It made me literally laugh out loud. Life has a funny way of showing us things. I basically just got out of something where I was pointing out all of these reasons why they are not the one for me. I think some of you will remember... or maybe not, it has been a loong time, but someone did that to me. They physically wrote out an email with paragraphs explaining to me why all of these things were not what they were looking for in their significant other. I may have not written a letter, but I am sure the pain he is feeling, or probably not, is much like the pain I felt at that time. I was CRUSHED. I thought I was a good person. I knew my reasonings behind things I did, but I could also see where he was coming from.

It is funny how, looking back, I was so angry with that person, and thinking to myself "How can they call themselves a Christian and sit here and judge me and tell me where I am wrong?!?" Now I see, at least in what I was thinking when I was doing it, was that I was only telling them these things in hopes that it would make them see they may be off the path and may want to think about things. I honestly thought they were better than their actions and was more disappointed. We are all called to be accountable of each other. If I am straying I would HOPE that someone would help me without waiting for me to realize it and asking for help. At the time it happened to me, I was not wanting to hear it and was so appalled, but it did make me step back and ask myself what I was doing and if this was what I wanted to be. I am by no means a saint or a perfect person, and I know I struggle daily, but it does hurt when someone tells you and it basically feels as if they are throwing in your face all of the things you know you struggle with. In my situation, I honestly don't think they are "struggling" with fixing those things, rather than that is just who they are.

I know the kind of person I was a few years ago, and I know who I am now. I did eventually see and understand all of the points that person made about me and honestly am a different person now because of it. I know they were not meaning to hurt me, and they even said that, but all I heard was someone pointing out every one of my faults. It is hard to keep that open mind when someone tries to tell you these things, but sometimes you have to take a step back, and see that maybe they are not hurting you, but they love you so much (as a friend, mind you) and have seen you grow, know your potential, and just want you to be your best self. We all have things we look for in the "one" we are all searching for, and just as I was not going to settle, he was not either.

I know how hurt I was at the time, and I do not wish that upon anyone. It took me a long while to get over it and understand, but I am better now for it. Hopefully, I did not hurt him as bad as I was, and hopefully he can see it was not to be hurtful, but out of love and that I see more potential than he is allowing.

You Can't Make Someone Be Your Friend

I saw this and was like yes, yes it is. I have learned that it is impossible to have a successful conversation with someone that has no intention of being anything but rude. It is so frustrating to explain anything to someone who only sees what they want to see and refuses to see the actual picture in front of them. I have tried to mend the friendship but sometimes you just can't because the other person is so impossible. They think by being rude they are winning over you. It drives me nuts when people act that way. I like to think that I am an open minded and forgiving person. I know we all have situations where we draw our own conclusions from only one piece of data, but sometimes we don't see the full picture. We have to be able to sit back and see that we only saw a portion of it, and that once the full picture is revealed, we can then realize maybe the conclusions we drew on the portion were not true of the whole. I am frustrated with people who only see the portion of the picture and refuse to see the whole. They draw conclusions on one instance and once the truth is revealed, they refuse to listen to it. I guess if they really valued the friendship they would take time to listen. I know you can't make people be your friends but it hurts when they base their refusal on something they concluded that is false.

On that note, thanks to my genuine friends who know who I really am.

Truth

*Hangs head in shame...

I know I am a horrible person. I have left my three followers hanging for months since my last post! Well, don't feel left out. Nothing has been happening except boring, normal life stuff. I have been working a lot, trying to not spend money, and just focusing on myself lately. I know life is full of ups and downs, I just feel like I get excited all too often and then I am basically back to wondering who I am all over again. I have a goal that is just a personal goal I have wanted to work toward for a long time. I always brainstorm but I never actually get anything done. I blame it on money but I know that is a lame excuse and I can make the sacrifices in order to fulfill my goal. I am going to stick to this commitment though this time, to not stray and get caught up. I know what I want to accomplish and I feel so far from that. I want to get back to business with myself and get focused again on what I want for me. I know that it will not happen overnight. It most likely will take years to develop, but it is constantly on my mind and I am constantly telling myself I am failing because I have not been able to get any further with it. Prayers please!

"You can hire a Taco Guy! Genius!!"

So one of my bosses had his annual Taco Birthday Bash this past Saturday at his house. At first I thought he was just cooking up all the meat on his grill and everyone ate tacos. Then I was informed that no, you can hire some taco guys to come over and make them for you! They come about an hour and a half before you want to eat, bring all of their equipment and food, and cook up everything and SERVE you! It was so much fun. Here are some pics:

 I had one of each of the meats. There was beef, chicken and pork. The pork was my favorite. It was like churizo or something? I dunno, I dont ask questions, I just eat :)

We played games all day like corn hole, beer pong, some frisbee game with tiki torches? and then that game with the balls on the string. I stuck to corn hole, beer pong and watching others! Once the sun went down we lit up the fire pit and roasted marshmallows! I dont like marshmallows but I do like the outside shell when you roast it :)

Sunday was also a gorgeous day, so I took the babies for a longer walk than usual. Here is a pic from our walk:

That was my weekend! I got sun burned Saturday. I love a little bit of red on the shoulders though. Hope everyone else had a good one!

<3 y'all!

Ten Things You May Not Know About Me...

Or maybe some of you do know!

1. I am terrified of thunder and the dark. I hate thunder. I am so scared to be alone when it is thundering outside. I also have to turn on every single light in my path. I lived with my sister for a while and she would make fun of me so much because I would turn on every single light when I went downstairs to the kitchen. Maybe I am afraid of someone hiding in the darkness, who knows.

2. I live right by the water but you will never see me in it. I have issues with bodies of water. I will only get in the river or the lake if I am on a float. I will NOT get into the ocean unless the water is so clear and there are a million other people in there as well. My family vacations in the Carribbean a lot and we go snorkling and scuba diving. I will get in for about three minutes then I am out.

3. I am the least artistic or creative person but for some reason I love attempting to be creative. It never works because I was just not given that talent, but I love spending time being creative whether it be sewing, painting, or writing.

4. I have an AWFUL scar on my stomach from being ridiculously stupid one night while hanging out with the wrong type of people! Should have gotten stitches but instead I just put butterfly bandages on it and now it looks so gross.

5. I have only broken one bone in my entire body and it was my pinky toe. I was doing double fulls on the mesh tramp at the gym and when I landed I was still twisting. My toe got caught in the mesh and it just ripped it sideways. I was always really lucky in tumbling and cheer to not break anything except that little guy.

6. From October 1, 1998 to October 1, 1999 I had three cars. I turned 16 on Oct 1, 1998 and then on Friday the 13th in November (yes six weeks after) I totalled my car. My parents got me another one a few months later. About two months after that, I was on my way to Cheer Athletics practice when someone hit me running a red light and totalled that car. I was like a magnet that year. My parents got me another car after that and I had that car, luckily until 2005.

7. Contrary to what some people think, I was not popular in high school. Yes, I cheered, but I was not friends with any of those girls. They didn't talk to me outside of cheer practice, ignored me in the halls, and when I had a cheer swim party at my house Senior year, no one showed up except the freshman cheerleaders and some JV girls. I was one of the only ones in honors and AP classes so I was the outcast. I was even nominated senior year for Princess of the homecoming Court and to this day I think it was a big joke so they could all laugh at me for thinking enough people actually knew who I was. I will never forget Senior year first day of school, we wear our uniforms to school and I am sitting next to this basketball player who I have known since 6th grade. He looks at me and says "You're a cheerleader? I have never seen you before in my life." Awesome. I have been cheering for you since 6th grade but you have never seen me. Proof that I was invisible. I think I was somewhat cool my sophomore year because I dated a senior and hung out with a lot of them, but once they graduated, I was back to being a nobody.

8. I love photography. I wish I were better at it, but I love taking pictures of people, flowers, structures, anything. I was on the photography staff in high school but with cheerleading it was kind of hard to be a photographer at every event you are already cheering for. I got this amazing camera for my 18th birthday. It is outdated now with all the digital ones around, but I will never get rid of it. I love it. I still buy film and use it from time to time.

9. I had a beta fish in the dorms at Texas Tech named Mr. Pooky. Named after the rapper. I would play "Crook for life" and he would nod his head.

10. And last but not least, you may not know this, but I have been on stage at an *NSYNC concert. Hahahaha, my friends and I had front row tickets to their concert at Reunion Arena. Before the show this dude was handing out bracelets to random girls to go on stage during the show for "For The Girl Who Has Everything". Ten girls got chosen. I was one of them. I got to hug all of the members. I remember not washing and keeping that shirt in the back of my closet for the longest time. I also slept in the middle of Times Square outside of Virgin Megastore to get JT to autograph my Future Sex Love Sounds CD when it was released. This was ten years later hahaha. Still a teeny bopper at heart. I wish they would do a reunion tour. I would totally go.

Not a fan of chicken breast...UNTIL NOW!

I should have taken a picture of this but I was too busy eating...story of my life! Haha.

I used to eat a lot of chicken and veggies when I was in college, because I was always trying to keep up my appearance. (Having to prance around in a college cheer uniform every Saturday will do that to ya!) I got to a point where I was so sick of it after a while. Since then, I hardly eat chicken. Unless I can cover it in a sauce or it is battered and fried :)

I saw this recipe and decided to try it out. It is AMAZING! I am now a lover of chicken in the crock pot and this SUPER easy recipe is impossible to screw up. Here is what you need:

1 packet of Taco Seasoning
1 packet of Ranch Dressing (this is the seasoning in the packet used to make the dressing)
1 to 2 cans of Chicken Broth (I used the low sodium one)
Frozen Boneless Skinless Chicken Breasts

First, lay the chicken breasts in the crock pot. I grab a cup and mix the two seasining packets with one can of broth and then pour it over the chicken in the pot. If you have thicker chicken, you will want to add the second can of broth so that the chicken is covered. You can either cook it fast (on High for a few hours) or if you are like me, put it on low when you leave for work and then in the evening it will be perfect :)

You can either pull apart the chicken or dice it up. I used this for tacos/ fajitas, burritos, wraps, and also paired it with some veggies. The flavor is so yummy and the chicken is so tender and juicy. It was so easy and so delicious!

Happy crock potting!

Crazy Love! *This time not the book :)

I read this article called “Why Women in Their 20s Rush Into Marriage” and it really got me thinking/ made me sad. It basically was saying that, either women had already been in a very good relationship and it ended leaving them thinking they would never be able to find that again, or they were in a comfortable relationship and marriage was just the next step. They admitted to not even feeling that crazy love for their spouse, but that everything was comfortable and worked so why not. I don’t know about you, but to me, life is not about having a roommate that you happen to have children with for the sake of having children. I think why this hits so close to home for me, is that I have a good mix of friends who are single as well as married, and I see this in my own circle. Some of my best friends are married to the loves of their lives, and it is such a beautiful thing to witness. I am going to straight out name Britt, Tiffany, Leslie and Jena for being a wonderful inspiration for me on how to be a wife and mom. *Disclaimer, because I feel someone will ask, yes my parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles are all wonderful examples as well, but for this post, it is about people my age and friends. Ok back to my girls. If you spend any time around these ladies, or know them, you know they have found the person who loves them completely and that they love the same way. They have such wonderful children because they are in a loving family where the kids will grow up respecting the other sex because of the example their parents showed.


On the other hand, I also have married friends who, personally, I do not see the spark. I am in NO way, shape, or form naming names, nor am I saying that if you are not Britt, Tiffany, Leslie, or Jena then you are in the category. I am simply saying, you yourself have confided that it was comfortable and you wanted to be married so you did. I am not pointing a finger or blaming anyone. I, myself, was two weeks away from marrying someone I was comfortable with. Luckily, I had examples of that crazy love so I knew I had to take a chance that there really was something like that out there for me. I was a victim of having, what I thought at the time, was a perfect relationship and lost it. I felt I would never find that again, and it only came once. So the next best thing was someone I was comfortable with. Everyone was getting married and I wanted to be married. It was a really hard thing to do, but calling off that wedding was the best thing. I am not one who wants to get divorced, and so I knew I had to call it quits. I feel really sad for my friends who are in these comfortable marriages. I see them doing things that are not things that married people should be doing, which is also a sign there is a problem.

Now, let’s chat about the single ladies. For the past few years, I have been focusing on me, so I have been a single girl, and honestly at times, guilty of being the person I am about to describe. Every girl has a list, whether it is physical or mental, they have “criteria” they are looking for in their mate. Of course we all want someone who drives a Bentley, already owns a mansion, has no children, the perfect parents, and will inherit his father’s business. And then you woke up from your retarded dream you were having. Sadly, there are single girls out there that are seriously looking for that. They may not be those same exact things, but it boils down to someone who makes a lot of money and can buy them a lot of “things”. If “things” made us as happy as people do, then their luster would not wear away and we would not have to go buy some other new thing to feel that happiness again. It is a horrible cycle that a lot of people are stuck in. Finding someone who can take you on trips and buy you cars and purses is not the person you should be looking for. If you want to be in a comfortable marriage with the threat of divorce down the road, then fine, go with that. For me, I would rather be living in an apartment my whole life with the one person who makes me laugh and smile constantly and loves me for every inch of who I am, than be in a huge house with someone I am not completely in love with.

Single girls should be looking for a person who is more than the outside appearance. Find someone who adores you for your relationship with God, your brain, your kindness, and your potential for the future to raise children. Also, be with the person that has those same qualities that you adore. I know it is hard approaching 30 and still looking for Mr. Right. I have faith that it will happen for you, though. I mean, look at me. It just happens. And when it does, you know. If you don’t know, then don’t sit there trying to convince yourself. You could be missing out on the real thing. Pray and talk to God about it, and believe that being single your whole life is not His plan for you. Trust Him and work on being the best version of you, not a version of you that you want to be to attract someone fake. I believe the divorce rate is so high because so many people get married for the wrong reasons, whether it’s because it’s comfortable or because they just want to be married. I believe in love and romance and I wish for all of my friends to find it and have the best lives ever :)

The greatest love of all and best example of the love we should give and hope to receive in return, is the love Jesus has for all of us. He died for us. He loves us so much that he died, so we could live a better life. I am not saying physically die for someone, but to have that much love for someone that you only want the best for them and give them the best of you. As Christians, we are called to be the example of this kind of crazy love, and if you can't even give it to your spouse, then what are you doing? We were created to love. Love the lord, love your spouse, love your neighbors! Get rid of the negativity and be the loving person God created you to be, and you will find what you are looking for.
 
XOXO

I have the best friends!

I just want to take a moment to say THANK YOU to every one of my friends and family members that are just awesome. I am so thankful to have people who care and are supportive of me. You have listened to me whine about life, but most important, you were there with smiles and hugs when I had something exciting to tell you.  I have a handful of friends that I have either known for a long time, through church, school, or work, or just recently met, and I just want you guys to know that we have been through a lot and I love you!! I appreciate you being there for me and loving me. We may not get to talk everyday, week, or month, but when we do get to talk or see each other, it feels as if no time has passed. That is what a true friend is.

Proverbs 16:28

"He will give you the desires of your heart."

I absolutely adore this verse. There is so much power behind the words. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart! I think too many people misinterpret this and in the end get frustrated that they were not given what they desired. I struggled with this for a while myself. I thought I knew what I wanted, but over time, I have learned more about what it means to delight myself in the Lord, and realized that what I thought I was looking for was nothing but a stereotypical being that had to have certain character traits. I believe the Lord gives us things once we finally understand and are ready for it. Otherwise, we take it for granted and we end up ruining it. I feel like I have finally realized what it really is I have been looking for, and I asked for it daily. I believe the Lord works in mysterious ways, and events in my life all had to happen a certain way and in a certain order for everything to align just right. I am finally in a place where I have been given exactly what I asked for and I thank Him everyday for it.

My challenge to you, is to really think about what you want, or if you are upset that you think you deserve something you do not have, and just take some time to dig deep and try to understand why it is that way. Maybe you are not ready for it. Maybe what you think you need is not what God has planned for you. Do not be angry if you do not have what you want. Realize that there is something even greater than you can imagine that He has in store for you. But you must delight yourself in Him, and ask. You may get what you want in time, or you may realize that there was a reason God did not want you to have that.

Spinach in the blender??

I keep reading all this hype over the juice cleanses and Green Monster Smoothies for weight loss. Since I am always looking for ways to lose weight, I read up on them. I did not want to invest in a juicer so I opted for trying the Green Smoothie. The recipe I originally found called for yogurt but I try to keep my dairy down to a minimum so I left that out. Basically you just use spinach or kale and then some fruits such as apples, pineapples, and bananas. Add ice or filtered water to get the consistency right.

My first thought was that this was going to taste so nasty but I had to say I at least tried it once! I was very surprised when I actually loved the flavor! You can not tell you are drinking spinach or kale. It has a very fruity flavor from all the fruits. I have been having these for breakfast for the past few days and I am kind of loving it! The first day I was hungry shortly after but the past few days it has been pretty filling. I think my body is getting used to it. I try to eat a salad or something healthy for lunch and dinner, but some of
these diets call for you to have these as two meals. I could see doing two
meals of this but I wanted to try it with one for now to see if I even liked it!
I know it sounds gross but I like it and maybe you will too! Happy blending :)

What are you thankful for today?

Just a little reminder (to the three people who read this) to be thankful in prayer! Too many of us are only active in prayer when we need help with something. Yes, the Bible says "ask, and you shall receive what you ask for" but it also says to be thankful! We forget to be thankful everyday for the blessings we have been given. So here is your reminder: Thank the Lord everyday for things that you value in your life, for He has given them to you!

Happy 2012!

I remember this time last year being so excited for 2011 and all of the "dreams" I had that I was going to turn into reality. My dream of moving certainly happened but instead of NYC, I ended up on the opposite coast! I am glad though, because everything happens for a reason and exactly the way it should happen. I LOVE living so close to the beach. I am also making some new friends and meeting some very nice people! My newest friend is Aliyah. She is the same age as I am and works in one of the courts downtown. She is such a sweet heart and a truely genuine person. We have been meeting up for meals and movies and having a great time! I have also been hanging out with some work friends and also other friends from Texas. It is hard to enjoy my time here though when I keep going back home or on other vacations! But I only plan on going home two more times until my birthday so I am excited about what is to come!